The Last Word...
So often we end up in conversations where we don't agree with the person we are speaking with. When this happens we tend to get this overwhelming sense that we need to prove our point (sometimes no matter the cost). We feel as though we need to have the last word, that we need to leave them with the most amazing gem of knowledge that will make them concede their point, making you the victor. It sounds a little funny when you read this (at least it did to me as I was typing it), but it's funny because it's true. Our pride takes over.
What if I told you that you can be free from the last word? What if I told you that you don't need to win every argument? What if I told you that it is okay to let someone else feel as though they have the upper hand in a conversation (even if you are clearly correct in your line of reasoning)? What if I told you that relationships are more important than you proving your point? We don't think this way, we almost refuse to. I have watched relationships be destroyed due to prideful arrogance in arguments or discussions. When I first came to Christ I was so fired up, and I was way over zealous. I was so fired up that I was upset with my friends and family when they didn't share my excitement. It got to the point where some of them simply didn't know how to talk to me and as a result a distance was placed between us. I remember getting in an argument with my mom on the phone, during that argument God had a dear brother in Christ call me. When the argument ended I called my friend back, I was so hot that I just started venting and pouring out my frustrations, my friend just listened. After I was done spewing my frustrations my friend said 9 words that I will never forget, he said "don't simply tell them about Christ, show them Christ." We then unpacked this more. I was a new believer so for me this information was very fresh to my ears. We looked at the process of someone coming to know the truths of the Scripture, we looked at the reality behind what it means to live the gospel, what it means to show people Christ. My actions along with my words were pushing people away from the truth rather than towards the truth. I was a stumbling block because I wanted so desperately to prove my point, and it was no longer about the salvation of my family and friends but rather me showing just how right I am (if I am honest I used the motive of their salvation as a cover up for what was really happening in my heart.) After that conversation with my friend, I changed. I realized he was right, and instead of arguing my point, I set out to love on my family and friends who don't know Jesus. I still engaged (and still do engage) in hard conversations but it was (and is) no longer about me proving my point but rather about showing them Jesus even in a disagreement so that they may come to know Him as I do. I seek to share the truth in love.
My first blog was in relation to politics and how the way we live matters even in the midst of a heavy political climate. In those conversations we are so concerned with proving our point that we go to great lengths so demonstrate just how wrong the other person is. I have watched slander and name calling come out of the mouths of those who profess Christ and it breaks my heart. We cannot speak to the love of Christ if we are not willing to share the love of Christ with others, especially those we disagree with. I for one am glad that Jesus didn't and doesn't take that approach with us. The Scripture makes it clear that "When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners. Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation. For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son. So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God." Romans 5:6-11
The way we live matters because their are lives at stake. Are you more concerned with winning an argument then you are the eternity of the lost?
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